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The Heavy Ball

'Never fly a toy helicopter into a wig'

Essential New Year wisdom in our Twitter round-up this week

Alex Bowden
03-Jan-2013
Stuart Meaker got rid of Virat Kohli, India v England, 2nd Twenty20 international, Mumbai, December 22, 2012

Stuart Meaker: miniature aviation expert  •  BCCI

If you're wondering what the world's cricketers had to say about New Year, there was lots of talk about positivity and what a great year it's going to be. Words like "hopes", "dreams" and "success" featured in most tweets. In short, everyone was really, really dull.
The New Year
Graeme Swann expressed it best.
The playlist
Shane Warne (@warne888) has a reputation as a guy who likes a party, but what would be the soundtrack? This week he made a new playlist. Here are the tracks he felt he could share with us…
"In a Big Country" by Big Country
"Welcome to the Boomtown" by David and David
"Don't Pay the Ferryman" by Chris de Burgh
"Midnight Blue" by Lou Gramm
"Real Gone Kid" by Deacon Blue
"Kiss This Thing Goodbye" by Del Amitri
"Just Can't Get Enough" by Depeche Mode
"The Boys of Summer" by Don Henley
"Hot Stuff" by Donna Summer
"Soul Kinda Feeling" by Dynamic Hepnotics
Someone confiscate his MP3 player. He can't be trusted.
The "what if"
Kraigg Brathwaite envisions a better world.
The why
Andre Adams witnessed New Zealand's 45 all out.
Presumably because Brendon McCullum wanted to both bat and bowl on the first morning, in which case he got his wish.
The bright side
Scott Styris didn't think it was that bad.
At least he was realistic enough to include the question mark.
The retirement
Michael has finally called it a day - Vaughan, that is, not Hussey.
Details are hard to come by, but it's safe to assume that Hussey's cricket career was longer and more successful than Vaughan's kite-surfing career.
The doctor
Feeling under the weather? Ask Dr Kevin Pietersen.
Stick to cricket.
The lie-in
Matthew Hoggard has a plan.
It's genius until the evening when they won't go to sleep.
The lesson learnt
Stuart Meaker has some advice that could prove of enormous value in the future, so pay attention.
So what are we supposed to fly helicopters into and what are we supposed to fly into wigs? This advice is incomplete.
Tino Best feels that Tino Best is the ideal role model, even if he doesn't know the difference between "your" and "you're".
What's your philosophy?
Shaun Pollock wishes you a happy New Year.
That only really works as written philosophy.
Nando's Watch
Didn't see any references this week. Perhaps 2013 really will be a different year…

Alex Bowden blogs at King Cricket