Kohli at the Optus Stadium: a full sensory experience

"Dink"

The ball was supposed to meet the middle of the bat. It didn't. A wholesome wooden sound instead turned into a hollowed out squeak.

"Aaarrggghhh"

Virat Kohli's scream cut through the air in Perth, which carries a noticeable suburban charm, a quiet that can often be taken for granted. There are, however, places desperate to take the city into the future, like Optus Stadium whose blueprints could come in handy as a starting point for a UFO with its vast, oval, metallic magnificence. Its walkways on the outside remain open to the public. Cyclists and runners make good use of them. The cricket nets are just off of these walkways. People could simply drop by and watch the world's most popular cricketer doing his thing. A handful of young adults did and were rewarded with his autograph.

"THUD!"

The cover drive was out and it seemed to be in perfect working order. Kohli was being very selective with it. He wasn't going to his go-to shot unless he could reach somewhere at least close to the pitch of the ball. A large portion of his 9040 Test runs have come because he is this thorough.

(An entirely muffled) "Thud."

Kohli went after something that was almost comically wide of off stump and fell right over onto his back at the batting crease. He shouldn't have reached out so far and it felt like he was in disbelief that he had and that's how he expressed it. It's so much fun watching him, no matter what he does - he's even helped out by zhuzhing his hair up a bit, It's more brown than black.

The other senses aren't left wanting either. "Whiiirrrr". He flicks his wrists and the bat spins out of his hand, hovering in mid-air, until he catches hold of it again. There are entire edits of him doing just this on Reddit. He's made a nervous tick look cool. "Tap tap tap". He gets into his stance and to face the bowler. "Clap clap clap". India will hope that's the noise that follows immediately afterward. It did at the nets on Wednesday, when he played that performative forward defensive, giant stride down the pitch, head down, bat close to pad, with complete confidence he had absorbed all the venom in the ball fed by a throwdown specialist from less than 22 yards.

These moments, though, were sprinkled in between others where he couldn't will his intentions into reality. It's become a whole thing. Early Kohli had no filter. He was box office. Fab-four Kohli had, at best, one weakness. He was unreal. Present-day Kohli is veering dangerously close to being human. He's having bad days at work. Over the past five years, he averages 33.45 with three centuries in 61 innings. In the five years before that, he averaged 62.78 with 20 centuries in 89 innings.

Some of his recent dismissals have been bizarre. Caught behind off Glenn Phillips. Bowled by a full toss from Mitchell Santner. Run-out in the dying stages of the day's play. Others have followed a pattern. A continued vulnerability against left-arm spin and an over-reliance on his front-foot shots. All of it has prevented him from spending any meaningful time at the crease. Four of his last five innings have lasted less than 10 balls and only one of his last 14 have gone past 100.

There may be a connection to that and the kind of training Kohli has been doing in Perth. He was out caught in the slips during one of the match simulations at the WACA and immediately went off to the nets for a half-hour session. He batted for much longer periods, on both days, at Optus Stadium. He gave himself time. He also had plenty of opportunities to play off the back foot and he took them; didn't attempt anything fancy, just kept going through drills where he tried not to follow the movement when the ball passed his outside edge and soften the grip on his bat when he couldn't quite get into the positions he wanted.

There was no jeopardy here at practice but Kohli created it for himself just like Morne Morkel, the India bowling coach, said he would. He was working hard at working within limitations, though there was this one instance when he couldn't help but soothe himself with an attacking shot. It was a back-foot swivel pull against Mukesh Kumar, immediately after he went past the bat, where he leaned his body weight to the off side just a little bit to manufacture the room that the bowler wasn't so keen to give him. The sound that came off his bat was "thwack," but it was so loud and rude it felt like it shouldn't be repeated in front of polite company.

The Indian fans have been yearning for him. Even in the middle of the home season, when he was responding to requests for pictures at the airport, he was met with "Virat bhai, BGT mein aag lagaani." There are wistful posts all over the internet; people looking back at his best innings in the way they look back on misspent youth, pundits explaining how he will get out of the rut and coaching staff hitting back at questions suggesting decline. There is noise on top of noise on top of noise. There always has been. Kohli is a full sensory experience.